I am convinced that unapologetic and sexually liberated women piss others off. After seeing the positive reaction that a lot of women gave to Nicki Minaj's "Feeling Myself" featuring Beyonce, the negative memes started to roll in. I saw both men and women taunting those who chose to post gifs or still pictures of Nicki + Beyonce. It started to occur to me that the celebration of two black successful women may not sit well with some people. No, they would prefer to see black women in "struggle" positions in order to feel better about their unfulfilled lives. Generally I try not to speak ill of others but seeing that I am blunt, I don't mind being unfiltered. 


It seems as if women in general have had to tip toe around patriarchy since the beginning of time and it is something that has sadly been engrained in the way that others choose to treat or think of women. We have been taught that our place is in the kitchen, at home raising children or giving pleasure to a man whenever he needs to be pleasured. Somehow our opinions and our desires were swept to the side because the man's opinions as well as desires were considered the most important. I can admit that I used to believe that my sole purpose as a woman was to bend to the will of a man. At 23, I can finally utter that I heard  the reasoning behind my sexual assault from the mouths of those who took advantage of me. I was told that I needed to be reminded that it is never  a woman's place to raise her voice at a man.  Do you realize the effect that has on a 17 year old girl? 17 years of being the vocal and expressive girl that I was horribly halted. I made apologies after apologies about my emotions, opinions and wants to so many people after that. I cringed each time that these things were disagreed with and I found myself having emotional outbursts from time to time. I wanted to be the expressive person that I am but I was afraid that I'd be "punished" and so I tucked away my expressive nature. Can you get me shut up now? Eh, just ask my boyfriend.
 More women are choosing to say to hell with gender roles and respectability politics. We are choosing to do away with the need to follow certain guidelines in order to be taken seriously. We are carving our unique paths and standing defiantly against a culture that tries to silence or dominate women. Life itself comes through women and we realize that our wombs are terribly powerful. Who else can deal with the shedding of their uterus every month (or every other month) until they are past their forties, still finding a way to accomplish their goals? Sexual liberation doesn't just stem from a woman's right to have as much sex as she wants even though it plays a part in it for some. Sexual liberation itself is a woman's decision to take control of her life, emotions, desires, goals and sexual energy. It is women's way of saying that we are the ones who have the sole right to ourselves and that no one else is allowed to determine anything for us that we do not agree with.

I applaud any woman who has learned or is learning to make peace with any trauma that she is experiencing in her life. I applaud the women who are brazenly unapologetic and make mountains out of mole hills. Women are innovative creators and forces of nature. We are no longer hiding behind our voices and being fearful of our desires. The age of the woman is upon us and we aren't asking for your permission to exist nor are we asking for you to like it.