On September 28, 1991 at approximately 4:31 AM, another black baby girl was born into this world. She was unaware of the experiences she would go through or the kind of people she would encounter. What she did know was that she was breathing.


Sometimes I forget to do that; breathe. As second nature as it is, remembering to slow down and breathe during difficult moments is something that I don't always do. If I can forget about breathing sometimes, you better believe that I also forget to believe in my brilliance. I've always worried that I would come off as either too much or simply not enough. Looking at myself through the eyes and opinions of others became so second nature that it felt weird and too brash to say that I was going to "reclaim" myself. Telling myself that my body is mine when I was raised to believe that I'm just "renting" this body while I'm alive felt foreign. BUT I've had to allow myself to start unlearning how everyone else feels that I should or shouldn't think of myself. Opinions of others are abundant but trusting my decisions and believing in myself has to matter to me. 

 Losing my youngest nephew hurt more than anything I've ever experienced but it birthed something within me. Because I know that he will never have a chance to chase his dreams and continue to spark the world with his brilliance, I told myself that I don't have room to consistently fill my head and heart with negative opinions of myself. Every day that I wake up is a reminder that I still have a chance at this thing called life and I have to believe that no mistake was made in being granted the chance to live. Something in the universe believes in my existence so what does it matter if I don't live up to the expectations of others? I've had to really stop and ask myself that question lately.

I won't pretend that everyday will be spent knowing that I am an incredible woman but knowing that I have something greater to keep moving for (the memory of my nephew), will keep a fire ignited in me that no man or woman can easily put out. The only things I don't believe about myself are that I was created to be perfect and take up space. Perfection and I stopped being friends a long time ago lol. And as far as taking up space? Listen, I fought to be here. Picking yourself back up after swimming in depression and suicidal tendencies are not easy tasks. This journey of mine has been prepping me for something bigger than I can imagine and I suspect that it's time for me to believe in that with everything I have. So what do you say? All in favor of believing in and flaunting your magic (however you define it), say I. Let's get it :).